so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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