You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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