She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
