you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
this is an emotional support booty call
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
