He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
