your parents love me but you hate me
nut hugger
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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