sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
