wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
