My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
