Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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