i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
