It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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