so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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