I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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