Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize