Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
