We're like a lot better than the average bears
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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