Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
