I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
