After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
