I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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