Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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