Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
