I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
