I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
