I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize