everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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