My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
