dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
