Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
