Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
