Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
