I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
