I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
