There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
