he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
