Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize