I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
