We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
