She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
