so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
