I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Randomize
