it wasn't lemon gatorade
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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