i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
So squirting runs in the family.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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