Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
