The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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