Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
