i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
