Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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