You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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